“The Art of Marriage" by Wilferd A. Peterson

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The little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands.
It is remembering to say "I love you" at least once a day.

 

It is never going to sleep angry.
It is at no time taking the other for granted;
the courtship should not end with the honeymoon,
it should continue through all the years.

 

It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating
gratitude in thoughtful ways.
 

It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have wings of an angel.
It is not looking for perfection in each other.

It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor.
It is having the capacity to forgive and forget.
 

It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow.

It is finding room for the things of the spirit.
 

It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and the obligation is reciprocal.
 

It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner. 

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From the Majority Opinion in the case of Hillary and Julie Goodridge v. Department of Public Health, 798 N.E.2d 941 (Mass. 2003) (Margaret Marshall, Chief Justice of the Massachusetts Supreme Court)

 

"Marriage is a vital social institution. The exclusive commitment of two individuals to each other nurtures love and mutual support; it brings stability to our society. For those who choose to marry, and for their children, marriage provides an abundance of legal, financial and social benefits. In return it imposes weighty legal, financial, and social obligations. 

 

Marriage also bestows enormous private and social advantages on those who choose to marry. Civil marriage is at once a deeply personal commitment to another human being and a highly public celebration of the ideals of mutuality, companionship, intimacy, fidelity and family.  

 

It is an association that promotes a way of life, not causes; a harmony in living, not political faiths; a bilateral loyalty, not commercial or social projects.  Because it fulfills yearnings for security, safe haven and connection that express our common humanity, civil marriage is an esteemed institution, and the decision whether and whom to marry is among life's momentous acts of self-definition."

 

 

 

"Union" by Robert Fulghum

 

To be read by Officiant

 

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes, to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making commitments in an informal way. All of those conversations that were held in a car, or over a meal, or during long walks — all those conversations that began with, 'When we’re married', and continued with 'I will' and 'you will' and 'we will' — all those late night talks that included 'someday' and 'somehow' and 'maybe' — and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

 

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, 'You know all those things that we’ve promised, and hoped, and dreamed — well, I meant it all, every word.'

 

Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another – acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, even teacher, for you have learned much from one another these past few years. Shortly you shall say a few words that will take you across a threshold of life, and things between you will never quite be the same.

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For after today, you shall say to the world — This is my husband. This is my wife.